There was an old person from Buda,
Whose conduct grew ruder and ruder,
Till at last, with a hammer,
They silenced his clamor,
By smashing that person of Buda.
The only problem is, here you have to pronounce ‘ruder’ like ru-dah…somewhat like something Ricky Ponting does when he’s saying, ‘The boys played bet-tah.’
In fact, as far as absurdity is concerned, nothing beats ye good old limericks. Ha ha…There’s one that goes:
There was the young lady of Niger,
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger,
They returned from the ride,
With the lady inside,
And a smile on the face of the tiger!!
And then there’s the one that was written by some forgotten poet:
As a beauty I’ a great star,
Others are handsomer far,
But my face__I don’t mind it,
Because I’m behind it,
It’s the folks out front that I jar!
And then…ha ha…sorry…I’m on a roll here so don’t try to stop me…
There was a young lady named Banker,
Who slept as the ship lay at anchor,
She awoke in dismay,
When she heard the mate say,
‘Hi! Hoist up the top sheet and spanker!’
There was a young wife from Antigua,
Who remarked to her spouse,
“What a Pigua,”
He retorted, “My queen,
Is it my manners you mean,
Or do you refer to my figua?”
Ha ha…There were some that even crossed the borders of silly and the language was exploited to its fullest
She frowned and called him Mr.
Because in sport he Kr.
And so, in spite,
That very nite,
And here’s my favorite one of all time,
A girl who weighed many an Oz.
Used language I dare not pronOz,
For a fellow unkind,
Pulled her chair out behind,
Just to see, or so he said, if she’d bOz!
Ha ha…sorry for the long post but it was just that…I couldn’t resist.